There once was a young man name of Sherlock,
Whose pal surely suffered from shell-shock.
Thumping from the next room
Seemed a cannon-like boom,
So dates had to come somewhere down the block.
Sherlockian limericks are one subject we shall probably never ever know enough about. William S. Baring-Gould, creator of our first great annotated Sherlock Holmes, wrote a nice little tome called The Lure of the Limerick. Isaac Asimov have a little collection of his Sherlockian limericks, one per case on each of the sixty stories, published by The Mysterious Press under the title Asimov's Sherlockian Limericks. But the best stuff, the very best stuff, has probably never seen print.
I mean, Asimov's Sherlockian limericks are nice, but have you ever seen his other limericks, which are more of what the bawdy little rhymes are more properly like? The ones where he uses his grown-up words, like the -- excuse me for this offensive way of putting it -- "F-bomb"?
The guy could write a limerick!
But the constraints of polite society are always holding back the limerick, and some of the best I've heard have been during a good social eve of drinks and rhyming where things were made up on the spot and never put into the public record, usually for good reason. Asimov had to have Sherlockian limerick or two that didn't make print, and Baring-Gould? He surely did as well.
Given the level of rowdy sexiness going on out there with things like Red Pants Monday these days, I have to wonder if the Sherlockian limerick might not be coming back in a big way. Sherlock Holmes has never been sexier than he is these days, and a little sex can help make a limerick a lot more fun. As in a certain fellow . . .
Moriarty, suddenly Mr. Sex,
Working hard, criminal empire erects,
Saturday Night Fever
And all kinds of haver,
Charm the ladies much more than his pecs.
Are there any good Sherlock limerick site out there, where under the cover of Tumblr pseudonyms, poets are running wild and free? Let me know.