The terrific mind of Marilynne McKay sparked an epiphany for
me tonight. She’s one of the brighter Sherlockian lights you’ll ever meet, so
that’s not too surprising. (After blasphemously saying a lot of Sherlock Holmes
fans have crap for taste yesterday, I feel obliged to spotlight our better
side. Include yourself in those betters, please, dear reader. No, I’m not
pandering.) Marilynne caused my epiphany with a single name: “Quinn.”
As in “Aidan Quinn.”
I really find it quite wrong that a police investigator
named “Gregson” be anywhere close to as good looking as Aidan Quinn. The
paradox, however, is that I find it perfectly acceptable for a police investigator
named “Lestrade” to be as handsome as Rupert Graves.
Now, foes of my enmity toward a particular TV show that I’m
no longer writing about here will attribute this bias toward a particular TV
show that I’m no longer writing about here. But looking deep within my dark and
cavernous Sherlockian soul, I really find that isn’t the case.
Lestrade deserves to be a good-looking fellow. He earned it,
in my truly heartfelt belief.
Gregson, however? Pfui! A pox of ugliness upon him!
Yes, he was called “smartest” of the Scotland Yard bunch by
Holmes, and he did get in a few cases, but he never really redeemed himself to
me after that initial appearance in A
Study in Scarlet.
Lestrade, however, while apparently not smarter than
Gregson, was, to Holmes, “the pick of a bad lot,” so he must have made up for
Gregson’s slightly bigger brain in some other way. It was a subtle thing, but
there really could be no doubt who Holmes’s favorite was. If I remember
correctly, he was even the one Yarder we know to have spent the night on the
couch at Baker Street. When Holmes needed an official of the Yard, Lestrade was
his go-to guy.
A detail here, a detail there, and enough appearances in
enough cases without being a total jerk, and Lestrade kind of weasels his
ferret-like features into your heart. And after putting up with Watson
comparing him to a ferret in The Strand
Magazine all those years without complaint, doesn’t he truly deserve to be
handsome once in a while?
Gregson, however . . . maybe it’s that he has a whole first
name. That he rubs his hands together in a self-satisfied way. Maybe it’s that
tall, pale blond thing that makes him sound like that creepy vampire doctor in Twilight. I just don’t think he deserves
Aidan Quinn looks. A personal bias, I do admit.
“They are as jealous as a pair of professional beauties,”
Sherlock Holmes initially said in explaining Gregson and Lestrade to Watson,
but he was speaking metaphorically . . . or so we thought. Now television is
telling us that they actually are a
pair of beauties.
And at least one of them totally deserves it.
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