EDITOR'S NOTE: At his request, Don Murillo, the "Tiger of San Pedro" and "the most Canonical man in the Canon, will be reviewing CBS's Elementary for Sherlock Peoria this season. As the rest of the staff at Sherlock Peoria quit watching the show last season, we could not help but take advantage of his generous offer, spoilers and all. Take it away, Don Murillo! (And don't use it to torture the citizens of San Pedro, as has been suggested you might.)
Don Murillo was pleased to learn that last Sunday night, CBS was the most-watched network with over ten million watchers of the television tuning in when they heard the Elementary was not on the air. It is a tribute to the fans of Joan Watson and El Sherlocko that when CBS chose to schedule the same program as every other network in that time slot, the fans turned out by the ten million to say to CBS, "Yes, we support this Sunday night time slot in which you usually show us Elementary, but did not tonight!" That is four million more fans of Elementary than watched the season premiere the week before!
CBS has learned its lesson! Now they just have to explain to that third of Elementary fans who watch Madame Secretary the hour before and then change the channel that Elementary is conveniently on the same channel as the earlier show. No channel changing required -- convenience is one of Don Murillo's top reasons for loving this show! And what are the other reasons?
Did you not see what Don Murillo saw this night?
El Sherlocko has been kidnapped by drug smugglers who want him to solve a murder, and better still, they are both more tattooed than El Sherlocko and call him "homes" in a fashion favored by gang members from the old movies! Most comical!
El Sherlocko agrees, is let go by his captors, and looks at the shipyards over the internet long enough to see a ship, then it's back to the conference room at NYPD to work with the police, even though he has a "private client."
Eventually we get to Joan Watson helping Shinwell Johnson with a lease agreement, and some Asian men come to the door to reveal a shocking revelation! "Joan Watson" is not Joan Watson's real name! Just as seasons before we found that El Sherlocko went by "Scott" when he was younger, yet another mask comes off! As Don Murillo cannot write Chinese characters, he cannot spell Joan Watson's true name here, so he shall continue to call her "Joan Watson." It does seem to be her preference.
But Joan Watson has been hired by these men for her own case! I, Don Murillo, have often complained to my secretary Lopez that it was quite the indulgence for the Sherlock Holmes and the Dr. Watson to always work on the same investigation together in their original sixty cases. Just imagine getting to read "The Adventure of the Speckled Band AND the Beryl Coronet" as Sherlock Holmes and John H. Watson split their energies to work two cases at once, only running into each other when they took suspects to their regular Scotland Yard conference room for questioning. Elementary has fulfilled so many wishes of its fans!
International intrigues and constant threats to painfully kill El Sherlocko are playing to Don Murillo's soft spots this week, and the constant dialogue reminds Don Murillo of the Gilmore Girls. And the Imperial Jade Seal Of China is like the Maltese Falcon or the Golden Bird, from Sherlock Holmes and the Golden Bird -- a true object worth pursuit! El Sherlocko even reminds Don Murillo of a much-less-active Jason Statham this week and merely threatens to have someone else murder the villain horribly to elicit a confession.
Can this season get any better?
You tell Don Murillo, for next week, Joan Watson and El Sherlocko go to a nudist colony!