Friday, July 6, 2012

"Elementary" perversion.


The good Carter had Seinfeld on again tonight, and in a typical George Costanza move, Jerry Seinfeld’s pal George had become completely enamored with Jerry’s current girlfriend, just because she hated him so much.  As her hatred of him grew, so did George’s attraction.

I’m finding myself much in the same position – both positions, actually – with regard to the upcoming CBS Sherlock Holmes show Elementary. The shows premeses are wrong on so many levels. Sherlock the addict. The absence of that most classic of male friendships. Watson being paid to watch over Holmes by Sherlock’s father. Those tattoos. Oh, how wrong-headed it all looks! Especially with BBC’s Sherlock having raised the bar and so many other near-Sherlock TV shows already flooding America. Why can’t we have the REAL Sherlock Holmes instead of just another near-Sherlock with the actual name?
You see? I could rail on for hours about how much I hate the show, based on the minutes we’ve been shown so far. “Give it a chance,” one might advise. “Wait until you’ve actually seen a whole episode!”  But no, this isn’t about chances, logic, or sense. This is about George Costanza-type logic.

The more I hate Elementary, the more I find myself drawn to watch the damned thing. I’m starting to feel like a character in a typical romantic comedy, whose initial reaction to their opposite number is anything but romantic. Do I hate Elementary so much because I secretly am – GASP – on my way to becoming its biggest fan?

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!
(Well, Lucy Liu always has been kinda cute . . . EEP!)

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