Monday, April 29, 2013

Every . . . single . . . episode.

And in a shocking turn of events, I have been accused of not actually watching CBS's Elementary in a recent comment. Efforts have been made to discredit my bonafides for writing about Mr. Elementary and Joan Watson before, but to just start claiming that over half a year of pain and suffering did not actually take place? That's just going too far.

Oh, I have watched Elementary, my friends. I have watched every episode.

I may not have hung on every detail. I may have seen but not observed. I may have obscured my vision by wincing uncontrollably through many an early episode. But I have watched Elementary. 

My brain has tried not to dwell upon the experience, as I'd like to think kindly thoughts about those fans of the show in our little Sherlockian community. I have friends in that group, and I hope if I can just hold out until this thing is finally done, they'll free themselves of its influence and come back to the light. But, nooooooo, somebody has to go and accuse me of not watching Elementary, so I have to remember . . . .

But there are just four episodes left to go. CBS saved them up so they could run the entire month of May, the month Sherlock Holmes died . . . coincidence? Traditional Sherlockian wisdom is that Holmes is living as an ancient somewhere in Sussex now, barely kept alive by some exotic bee by-product. If that's true, is CBS trying to kill him a second time this May with its four-episode run climaxing in a rumored two-hour finale? Hopefully that poor old chap won't be watching this final five hours, but I will.

Yes, however grueling, this marathon must be finished.

And I may try to make the best of it. I may blog about the more positive aspects of the show. But to paraphrase the real modern Sherlock Holmes . . .

Oh, I may be on the side of the Elementary fans . . . every now and then . . . but don't think for one second that I am one of them.


  1. Thanks for the laugh in the morning! :-D))

  2. "I admit it: I pre-judged Elementary last summer before ever seeing an episode, and when it came out, well, I didn't even watch the first six episodes and just blogged based on what I read on the web. And then, when I finally did watch a whole episode, I still just could not bring myself to admit that here was possibly a true American counterpart to BBC's sets of Sherlock movies." April fool?

    1. Yep. Blogged on April 1. April fool!

    2. A thousand apologies! You did watch the first six episodes and you did not pre-judge "Elementary". I thought that, as a writer and a blogger, that you would pay close attention to the show you were critiquing to make the strongest and very best case against it. Your April 1 blog stated differently and I was wrong to believe it. I will instead believe what you write today: "I may not have hung on every detail. I may have seen but not observed. I may have obscured my vision by wincing uncontrollably through many an early episode. But I have watched Elementary." I wish you many more hours and years of self-imposed agonized viewing.

  3. LOL. Enjoyed that last line.


  4. I still have hope you you, Brad. I am enjoying "Elementary" very much, look forward to this month's epiodes (the Milverton episode was particularly good), and anticipate a second season with satisfaction.

  5. Let me whisper "groggy morning" in your ear.

    I am happy to give you the last word about not watching "Elementary" and more than happy to apologize for believing a statement you wrote on April 1 that is backed by the evidence of contemporary posts.

    This is from Thursday, September 27, 2012, apparently after broadcast of the pilot:

    "Tonight I enjoyed a really great hour of network television.Yessss, it was ABC’s Last Resort....I don’t really need to review Elementary here. You’ll find reviews all over the web. TV critics, mystery writers, Sherlock Holmes fans . . . I’ll let them pick at the details. I’ll let you in on a little secret, though. A lot of Sherlock Holmes fans have crap for taste. Always have....Now, if you’ve read this blog at all, you may consider all this just a final confirmation of a prejudgment made long ago. And in a way, it is. All the pieces of Elementary we’ve been given prior to the premiere episode were indicators of just what sort of show it would be. And the finished product is true to every bit of these early glimpses showed me. No worse. And no better. It is what it is."

    It certainly doesn't sound like a guy who could describe any part of the pilot and say what elements of the show failed to convey Sherlock Holmes. your posts after that do not impart a detailed knowledge of the show but a general "I-read-it-on-the-internet" acquaintance. On Saturday, October 20, 2012 you wrote:
    "...I finally wandered into an on-demand venue that was offering CBS television shows . . . including that pesky thing some Sherlock Holmes fans keep alluding to in desperation to talk about something.
    "Well, as I, too, like to talk about something, and there had been comments that it was getting better, I gave it another look. Not as anything to compare with Sherlock Holmes, mind you, but just as an entertainment to compete with watching “Ramen Girl” on Netflix or some SNL rerun on VH1. The results were not good.
    "The main character really wants to be House, but doesn’t have the charm. The fact that anyone even lets him at a crime scene seems as much a deus ex machine as anything else. And I kept finding myself wanting to take his charming “sober” companion away from all that and just show her a pleasant evening over dinner.
    "If you’d like to discount my opinions on this, I’ll give you an out: I didn’t make it through the whole episode. Probably not even half. Sherlock Holmes wouldn’t have tolerated this pretense at criminal investigation drama, and neither did I."

    Here it is, "I gave it another look" and "I didn't make it through the whole episode. Probably not even half." This does not sound like a guy who had watched the first three episodes. It sounds like someone who has yet to see one whole show. You continue, "Such a waste of all that money and opportunity . . . I suppose if I diligently watched this CBS pretense week after week, I’d grow used to it. If you subject yourself to any bitter flavor or bad smell long enough, you either become numb to it or start to enjoy it and ponder its “subtle” nuances as a substitute for real enjoyment. But is that any way to live life?"

  6. PART II

    So then, you are not watching the show weekly. You don't mention which episode you tried to watch. Was it the pilot?. In fact the first real indication that you were tuned in live to the show was Friday, November 9, 2012's "What do you call a problem like Milleria?": "Here's the thing: I find that I cannot seem to call the main character of CBS's Elementary by the name 'Sherlock Holmes.' I discovered this last night as I tried live-tweeting the latest episode." That is episode 6 and you mention nothing about the show itself. On Wednesday, November 14, 2012 you write, "So tonight, I watched what I've been told is one of the show's "better" episodes, "Child Predator," which I first turned off after five minutes or so." That was episode 3, broadcast October 18. You're just getting around to watching it mid-November, and unlike the 5 minutes in October, you watch the whole episode. Whether it was the first time or the second time you watched the full 43 minutes (without the commercials) of Elementary I'm not sure. But one can see why on April 1 when he wrote, "I admit it: I pre-judged Elementary last summer before ever seeing an episode, and when it came out, well, I didn't even watch the first six episodes and just blogged based on what I read on the web." I believed you. The evidence was all there, in your posts on the critical dates.

    So, when you write on April 29 that you've watched every single episode, I believe you. By April 29, you have. I also believe your April 1 statement. They are not mutually exclusive. All during those early months of the show's run you were criticizing a show you had barely seen and insulting those who did watch i